


Desperations and Misunderstandings

by Uchiha_Blood



Category: Naruto, Naruto Shippuden
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2015-10-13
Packaged: 2018-04-26 05:43:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4992523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uchiha_Blood/pseuds/Uchiha_Blood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sasuke is stuck in a village without enough money for a train ticket back to Konoha, where everyone thinks he is dead. He resorts to drastic measures (Sexy Hooker no Jutsu) to earn a little cash. Meanwhile, Naruto and the rest of the new Team 7 are searching for clues as to where Sasuke's body, which was never found, is. Their paths cross, leading to a very awkward encounter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Desperations and Misunderstandings

Sasuke was desperate. Really, really desperate. All he needed was twenty bucks for a train ticket from the village he was in to Konoha Central Station, but unfortunately, the people in Kuraigakure weren't very friendly. It wasn't that he didn't understand a lack of trust for strangers, but it was a little bit frustrating when his only source of money was loose change he picked up off the streets or out of vending machines. So far, he had twenty-nine cents. That would get him nowhere.

Desperate times called for desperate measures.

It was getting close to sunset, and that was when Sasuke had previously been harassed by prostitutes who either wanted money or claimed he was sitting on their bench. It was a public bench. A public bench that the girls almost always sat on in various levels of undress, trying to attract a mate.

Usually, Sasuke would find a bench in an area with very little traffic to sleep on, but this time he would have to take one of the benches in a busier area. Why? Because he had tried offering to mow lawns, weed gardens, paint fences, fix cars... hell, he'd even offered to scrub toilets for cash! He had tried all of these things, but no one would trust the shady-looking guy dressed all in black with his sunglasses on in the rain. 

"Well, here goes nothing," he muttered, stepping behind a tree. With a rapid series of hand signs and a not-so-delicate poof, he was now a scantily clad hooker. Had he known that he would ever have to use the Sexy Hooker no Jutsu Naruto had taught him, he probably wouldn't have made it this far for the sole purpose of avoiding this moment. 

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the park, Naruto and the new version of Team Seven were making their way through the woods along a trail that Kakashi had claimed was a shortcut. Suffice it to say that it was not. 

"Are we there yet?" Naruto whined, orange jacket sliding off his shoulders. 

"Does it look like we're there yet?" Sakura replied angrily, picking burrs off her sweater. 

"Ughhhh, I'm so tired I could sleep right here..."

"Right here? Next to a large pile of bunny poop?"

"Um, maybe I can make it a little bit farther..."

"That's what I thought."

Two hours later, Sasuke -- in the form of a busty woman with long, dark curls, fishnet stockings, and not much else -- had not earned a penny. At first, he had flirted with any man who walked past, but he had been flipped off too many times to keep that up. Now, he only interacted with anyone who showed interest. Which was one old homeless guy who smelled like a wet dog. Nothing.

Just as he was about to give up, he saw a group of shinobi emerge from the forest a little ways down the path. He watched them walk toward him, trying to see who they were. He couldn't see their faces in the long shadows of the trees, but he did notice a flicker of orange. Could it be?

As they got closer, he knew; the man clad in orange did indeed turn out to be Naruto, but he didn't seem to notice his old friend.

"Hey," he called out as the four shinobi passed, but his voice sounded strangely seductive because of the jutsu.

"Hey, yourself," Naruto said back. "Tempting, but I'm on a mission. Sorry, ma'am!" He turned and walked away.

"Wait!" Sasuke yelled, forgetting his current appearance. "Don't you recognize me?"

Naruto stopped. He turned around, letting his eyes wander over his friend's body. "Should I?"

"Yes."

"Well, I'm sorry, but I don't. Now, I really gotta go, because I'm trying to find the person who knows where my best friend's body is."

Oh. That's right. Naruto thought he was dead. His body had not been found after their last fight, and Naruto had assumed he hadn't survived and that someone had stolen his corpse. Maybe he could work with that.

"Who is -- er, was, your friend?" he asked, a purr-like undertone to his voice.

"Sasuke Uchiha. Dunno if you've heard of him."

"Actually, I have! And I know where you can find him, too."

"Really? Good, because I want to make sure he has a proper burial. He's gonna be buried next to his parents back in Konoha."

Biting back a smirk, Sasuke simply nodded. "That sounds like a nice thing to do for the poor man."

"Yeah. I think he'd appreciate it."

"I'm sure he would," Sasuke agreed.

"So, you say you know where his body is?"

"Yes, I do. But I can't tell you here. I'm not supposed to know anything, and I don't want to get in trouble..."

"You don't have to worry about these guys, they're my friends."

"I'm sure they're not a problem, but still, I'd rather be alone with you..."

"Oh. Oh," he said. "Okay, um, how about if you come back to our hotel with us? I have my own room. Would that be okay?"

He nodded. 

Twenty minutes later, after taking the ACTUAL shortcut to the Kuraigakure Inn, they were finally alone. Sasuke flicked his eyes about the room, taking in the scattered articles of clothing and empty candy wrappers.

"Oh, uh, sorry about the mess," Naruto said sheepishly, scrambling to pick up his mess.

"No, it's fine. I've seen worse," he said, cringing at how seductive and playful his voice sounded.

"Um, okay... So, you say you know where Sasuke is?"

"Yes, I do."

"Okay, where is he? Or do you want money first or..?"

"Naruto, you idiot," he said, shaking his head. "You still don't recognize me?"

"Huh? Sasuke? Is that you?"

Poof.

"Yeah," he mumbled, glad to be back in his own body. He stretched his arms, flexing his muscles a little.

"What? Oh my god, dude! How the hell--?"

"You never found my body. What made you think I was dead?" Sasuke asked, arms crossed.

"Well, I... That's a good point, actually."

"I'm a little offended, really. You know I could have killed you if you killed me. We're an even match."

"Yeah, I know, but I didn't see you and you didn't come back to punch me in the nuts or anything, so I guess..."

A flicker of amusement danced across his face as he turned to hide a smirk. "What makes you think I would have come back?"

"Because... B-because I love you, Sasuke. I know I didn't say it then, but I know it now. I love you so much it hurts. Please come home, Sasuke..." he begged, tears welling up in his sky-blue eyes.

Sasuke simply stared at him for a moment, taking in the words and burning them into his memory. This was what he had been waiting for his whole life. Not revenge, not hatred, not power, but love. Unconditional, unconventional, unintentional, undeniable love. 

"Funny story, actually... The reason you saw me like, well, you know... Anyway, most of the people in this village are assholes and wouldn't let me do any basic jobs for them because I ended up losing what little money I had on me when some dickheads decided to mug a drunk and injured shinobi on the road. I just needed twenty bucks for a train ticket..."

"So, wait, you were coming back?"

"I was. I told myself I could never go back, but fate keeps pulling us back together for a reason, and now I think we both know what that reason is."

Naruto laughed, wrapping an arm around his friend. "I love you, too."

"I never said--"

"You may not have said the words, but I got the message out of your cryptic, roundabout Uchiha-speak."

"Uchiha-speak? Cryptic? I do not--"

"Yeah, you do. You don't like sharing your emotions, so you turn it into a riddle. Your brother did the same thing, and so did Madara and Obito. It's in your blood, Sasuke."

"I... Okay, yeah, my brother did do that, and I guess I sort of adapted that somewhere along the way," he admitted, sighing deeply.

"You sure did. So, are you gonna say it?"

"Say what?"

"You know what."

"No I don't." 

"Yes you do."

"Tch, dobe," he muttered, throwing his arms around the blond and burying his face in the crook of his neck. "I love you, you usaratonkachi..."

"I love you too, teme. I always will."

Sasuke found that the tension in his muscles he had dealt with for almost ten years since leaving Konoha had all but melted away as he breathed in the sweet scent of cologne, sweat, and ramen. His mind was at peace, but the flame of his soul had not gone out -- in fact, it seemed to be burning brighter than ever before. He smiled into the soft folds of Naruto's hoodie, knowing that he was home at last.

As they embraced, neither said a word. Both were content to simply be, to simply exist in the presence of the other. Each believed that nothing could tear them apart now. At least, until a particularly foul scent began to mingle with the others.

Sasuke groaned, shoving the blond away and fanning his face. "Did you fart?"

"Oops?" Naruto said from the floor, grinning sheepishly. 

"Dear Lord, you stink! Now I know why Kiba used to complain about you so much."

"Sorry... Do you still love me?"

He sighed, biting his lip. "Yes."

"Farts and all?"

"Farts and all."


End file.
